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[10 May 2008|02:28pm] |
ate so much garlic that when i farted i shit you not
it smelled like garlic
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[06 May 2008|11:24pm] |
i miss the fuck out of my bike serenity
you all suck
the end
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| tagged by beth |
[30 Apr 2008|02:47pm] |
List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good... but they must be songs you're really enjoying now, shaping your spring. Post these instructions in your LJ along with your 7 songs. Then tag 7 other people to see what they're listening to.
give me your day-randomizer.se
oo yah dood (boston jerk)- DJ bc vs big d and the kids table
hell on earth-big d and the kids table
thru the roof and underground-gogol bordello
somewhere in the between-streetlight manifesto
ganon slayer-madhatter
unleash the bastards-municipal waste
i tagg anyone who reads this and wants to do it
i talk to maybe 2 people on this thing anyways
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| what could i do? |
[30 Apr 2008|04:21am] |
| [ |
music |
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give me your day (disco remix!)-randomizer.se |
] |
the clam damp air surpressed more smoke than i could even count
and even tho this night was so calm and cool
and so beautiful
i missed the things i knew
but at this point would could i actually do?
so many choices i wish i could have changed
so many people i wish i could bring back into my life
at this point tho what could i actually do?
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| retarded but honest messege to a friend |
[30 Apr 2008|04:17am] |
dieforpeace (4:13:32 AM): you know this is random
dieforpeace (4:13:34 AM): and might sound bitchy
dieforpeace (4:13:36 AM): or gay or lame
dieforpeace (4:13:40 AM): and i dont care if you repsond to this
dieforpeace (4:13:49 AM): i need to throw this out at someone who wont give a shit or wont speak of it
dieforpeace (4:14:06 AM): but im a complete idiot
dieforpeace (4:14:23 AM): a horrible friend, and really bad at trying to make things i really want to work
dieforpeace (4:14:53 AM): i try my best fer asswholes who wont give a shit or who wont even think of it
dieforpeace (4:15:13 AM): and ill tell myself im fine with it but im not and i really hope alotta people fuck off and will rot eventually
dieforpeace (4:16:06 AM): but more than likely ill rub this off keep attempting stupid shit and convince myself ill get on by when i know i wont
dieforpeace (4:16:20 AM): sorry for this
dieforpeace (4:16:22 AM): peace comrade
dieforpeace (4:16:25 AM): talk to ya later
im just a warm bundle of regret, doubt, and anger...and i doubt itll change so might as well live with it aye?
anyone who gives me shit for this or calls me a bitch go kick rocks and fuck off
im sure your just as lame or as messed up as this post is
peace mates
im slowly learning how to care less and move on slowly
yay
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| an idea of how my mind has been behaving last few weeks |
[07 Apr 2008|06:04pm] |
the idea that life is pointless
is making my mind fill with
saliva
the beauty of life feels like
dead leaves under my feet
but those times may come
back another day
ill never know
the words i dont care
feel like an over simplistic
escape
more so than a shot of whiskey
or a glass of wine
that thought purely render
me purely useless
and its somehow been getting me
to drag on by for a few simple
more hours
im more bitter than what ill
ever be
im more pissed and agitated
and fed up than what ill ever be
but lovers in ink and words
give me a slight taste of joy
whetting my lips for
another day of tricking myself
that shit might just be ok
im sick of nostalgia bullshit
its like im chasing my tail
to the point where it stopped
being funny
amusing, touching, or amazing
but just something
annoying and creepy
it just kind of needed to slip away
even for a few minutes
hours
days
but hopefully years
i walk on thru
wet soil, crappy paved sidewalks
buying smokes or crummy food
to hold my stomach over
from wanting to puke myself
to an over empty oblivion
and i kinda hope at some point
i feel happier than what i do
i mean
im disapearing
vanishing
into not so thin air
and ending up in a place i dont
want to be
trying to obtain something
i want to be
does that make sense?
no? thats cool i can live
with that
ive been living with that all
my life
but at this point
it doesnt matter
for me the black and
white of this "future"
is do or die
do or fucking die
that makes me smile a bit
its reminding me of a plinko
game and the end of it is either
end and have equal oppurtunies
and im just fine with that
my hours are moving in
all directions more and more
giving me a slight sudden
real iz ation that fuck
im really just fine with that
and ill be just fine
gday mates
n gbye
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[04 Feb 2008|03:25pm] |
im couch surfin n a bumin thru chicago regions
its pretty neat
munchin on granola
and stuff
im with my girlfriend
i miss the skat rats
and pnkfgts
and bahst
and all you other shits
its only been 2 days
but the last 2 days have felt like weeks
fack off
talk to you kids later
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[07 Jan 2008|06:17pm] |
sometimes i hate my mind
if eel abandoned to easily
search for someone better
find someone better
not knowing the full story
of the person before
i feel horrible
but i cant apologize for it
it all just happens
if only my dreams
could manifest
when i woke up
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[19 Dec 2007|03:26pm] |
the trip to texas wasnt too bad
took some anti anxiety pills
ate a bagel
ate a sweet ginger bread cookie
napped uncomfortably on planes and busses
read quite a bit
wrote quite a bit too
ruined my lungs some with stale tobacoo
met and talked too some cool hispanic people
about my travel and where they were going
got to texas
met my sisters boyfriend
parents cooked me breakfast and took me to lunch
my brothers gonna be here in 2 hoursish
i got to hear from some friends
got to hear from emma which made me smile quite some bit
its been a quiet
warm
peaceful day
where im laughing at so many things
and people whove been nothing
but asswholes
because for some reason
being outta MI
has made me happier than
most of you jackasses out there
and all you jackasses i love to death
i miss you
peace out
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[18 Dec 2007|09:45am] |
tired of this knowledge
i spat seeds from the fruite
that came from the tree of knowledge
for this tree was old, along with its knowledge
and it was time for new knowledge to grow
because i dont know about you
but all this information
this tree has given me
has gotten moldy and bland
it was time to taste something new
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| unwelcomed visitor with false promises to the day |
[15 Dec 2007|01:00pm] |
god came to me many times in my day
asking me over and over to come back with him like the "good ol' days"
every time i would say "no im done with you"
and then on one day, like any other time he'd come to me
he offered something new,
"my 'son', i could offer you a world of beauty, a world of endless possibilites, i could offer you riches of the mind and profit, i could offer you anything you wanted and you wouldnt have to fight for it..."
"whats the catch?" i asked skeptically
and with a dagger always hiding behind his cloak
he replied
"i just need to take your dreams"
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[06 Dec 2007|04:55am] |
never coming back
sand pouring from the tip of my tounge, dragging fragments of my lips, leaving echos in the ground, i was blotting out ink, turning oceans around, leaving tracks in the sand, a million things i could say for every step, i was tired, non aware, listening to the waves tell me thier secrets and quickly run away...here we were forever gone, enjoying the rays of tilting suns...wishing how we could rush with the waves, and never to come back, never lacking what we needed on our backs...end
im going back to brighton today
i hung out with hugh last night
things seem to fall apart
then roll over again to something else
i dunno whats going on in my head right now
need tea
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| i felt |
[30 Nov 2007|08:05am] |
i was as lonely as a single stone in a giant empty field, holding nothing but the licks of grass and wind
i was as lethargic as the sun, moving slowly at my own pace, leaving a glowing trail to follow when the time was right
i was as quiet as the moon, sitting in peace and watching the world in the dark, there werent too many places to go or too many people to know but i kept watching it all before i slept
i felt as if i could be anything, anywhere, any place, and time wasnt an issue, i felt as if i could die or was already dead and the world was mine to see, and there wasnt an epic journey and there wasnt a single thing to show up or change, there was just the earth and myself and a few moments to kill here alone
i could repeat myself till im gone, and yet it still wouldnt matter, because here id be still smiling...go your own way with me, and tell me what you see...
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| shot poem |
[24 Nov 2007|11:26am] |
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have you ever noticed when your mind is gone, whne your limbs were loose, and you were exhausted beyond all measures...music was more beautiful, everything felt more free, more real, we could go anywhere and do anything and te consequences wouldnt come till we came back too....life was more beautiful like this
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| our ends |
[21 Nov 2007|01:09am] |
our end
the world was green again
but something was missing
a sea of money burnt and led
useless souls to a useless afterlife
the pain of this world was our illusion
the illusion of our world became our pain
transformation and change never held back
you couldnt hold yourself back from the transformation and change
destroy your thoughts, and your culture and knowledge
they wont be needed for you in this place
your ruins were the city
your cities became one with the trees
you couldnt hold back here
this is where sun molded with the decay of our yesterdays
our apokolyptic dance was underway
we werent useless
it was useless to be we
single manifested tales
to magnify our own beauty
we were just we
that was all we needed
we were what survived,
the ones who failed to surpass
failures could now sing
and losers could remember dreams
because in our end
we were the flesh that fed the planet
and our searing memories could finally reach the sky
no limit existed beyond our deaths
someday
we'll be immune
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| the quest for certaintea-crucial unit |
[15 Nov 2007|11:22am] |
on the road and jonezin' for tea - pure hatred for dry country. choose death before a mouth any dryer - iced cold brown lust liquid desire. microbrewed. on the quest for the best iced tea. on the quest for the best qualitea. on the quest for the best quantitea. on the quest, on the quest for certaintea. if your veins were filled with tea - the unit would rush to your rescue. looking for tea left and right - nothing but snapple in our sight. in the mountains and in the woods - through the desserts and seas of blood. looking for tea - searching for tea. willing to fight in the day and in the night - willing to fight with all our might. this is our life’s blood!
goddamn
i love tea
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[14 Nov 2007|01:11am] |
im not gonna grow up, i know who i am, i just need to reestablish myself in a new way...maybe this was the chance i was looking..
to vanish away for a bit, i love them all to death but i couldnt handle it if this is how things were gonna go...
'release myself from the edges of a clip
when you fall i hear everything becomes apparent and real
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jurks's journal
